Cockatrice+Hikari/Kurayami Drakes *Piccys**Please Comment*

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kevin19980609
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Cockatrice+Hikari/Kurayami Drakes *Piccys**Please Comment*

Post by kevin19980609 »

Cockatrice

Descriptions

General:
Cockatrices have a head of a rooster and the body of a winged dragon. The cockatrice is said to be born when a toad or serpent incubates an egg laid by a rooster. It is said to be able to turn living creatures that look at it into stone. The only creature immune to the cockatrice's power is the weasel, which is one of the few creatures that can defeat it. It's powers are rumoured to still be effective after death.

Egg:
The egg has a red crest, small wings, and a tail poking out.

Hatchling:
A little wobbly on its talons, it follows you around. It is usually gentle but can attack when annoyed. It uses its small wings to fly short distances. You are careful not to look at it so you won't turn into stone. Other creatures get along fine with it.
Small dragon with rooster head, green scale, wings, and a tail. Lying on the ground

Adult:
The fully grown cockatrice is strong and ferocious. It gets along fine with magi as long as they don't look at it. Its wings are now larger and can fly longer distances than before. The cockatrice has now learnt to control its powers more. Other creatures don't enjoy its company.
Large dragon with green scales, wings, a tail, and rooster head. Looking ferocious

Please comment, feel free to help
Last edited by kevin19980609 on September 16th, 2009, 7:29:49 pm, edited 12 times in total.
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Re: Kevin19980609's Entry : Cockatrice and Hikari/Kurayami Drake

Post by kevin19980609 »

Hikari/Kurayami Drake

Hikari Drake Description

General:
Hikari Drakes are relatives of the Kurayami Drakes. The main differences are that Hikari Drakes are pure white with silver stripes and Kurayami Drakes are black with gold stripes. Also, Hikari Drakes radiate light while Kurayami Drakes are shrouded in shadows. Hikari Drake give good luck to humans and other creatures. Hikari Drakes usually live high on top of the Alasre Mountains and help passing humans across dangerous paths.

Egg:
The egg is white with silver stripes, feathered wings, and a tail. It seems to be radiating light.

Hatchling:
The small white drake seems to enjoys flying with its wings and helping other creatures. Good luck seems to come to all that are near. The other creatures enjoy its company and like to play with it.
Small white drake with silver stripes, gold underbelly, thin, feathered wings and radiating light. Lying on ground

Adult:
The adult Hikari Drake likes flying up to high mountains and helping humans across bottomless abysses. It spends most of its time helping others and all the other creatures are drawn to it. It can light up even the darkest and most dangerous places.
Large white drake with silver stripes, gold underbelly, thin, feathered wings, and radiating light. Standing on ground

Hikari is Japanese for "light"

Kurayami Drake Description

General:
Kurayami Drakes are relatives of the Hikari Drakes. The main differences are that Kurayami Drakes are black with gold stripes and Hikari Drakes are pure white with silver stripes. Also, Kurayami Drakes are shrouded in shadows while Hikari Drakes radiate light. Kurayami Drakes give bad luck to humans and other creatures. Kurayami Drakes usually live in dark caves deep beneath the Alasre Mountains and only come up once in a while to attack passing humans.

Egg:
The egg is black with gold stipres, bat-like wings, and a tail. It seems to be shrouded in darkness.

Hatchling:
The small black drake seems to enjoy hiding in dark places and attacking other creatures. Bad luck seems to come to all that are near. The other creatures are scared of it and run away when they see it.
Small black drake with gold stripes, silver underbelly, thin, bat-like wings and shrouded in darkness. Lying on ground

Adult:
The adult Kurayami Drake likes dark places and hates other creatures and humans. It spends most of its time attacking others and all the other creatures are afraid of it. It can darken even the brightest and happiest places and moments.
Large black drake with gold stripes,silver underbelly, thin, bat-like wings and shrouded in darkness. Standing on ground

Kurayami is Japanese for "darkness"

Maybe recolours of each other and different wings?

Please comment

http://img406.imageshack.us/img406/4895 ... thingy.png
30 second pose
Last edited by kevin19980609 on September 16th, 2009, 7:31:06 pm, edited 13 times in total.
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by kevin19980609 »

Anyone want to comment? Just added the *more* detailed descriptions
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by Gooey Kablooie »

Great work!
I've just got a few things you may want to touch up and remember these are just suggestions:

The term "cockerel" means a very young rooster, usually under the age of one. Most people actually do not know this term, so you may be better off just referring to it as rooster.

Roosters don't lay eggs, only hens do.

You also may want to tone down the cockatrices petrifying abilities. Magistream is typically a "friendlier" place, so perhaps keep it at a tone similar to the Basilisks.

With the dragons you may want to get more descriptive, they immediately conjure up thoughts of the already existing void and celestial dragons.

Anyways, that's purely me being nit-picky. Great job and good luck in the contest. :wave:
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by kevin19980609 »

Atually, a cockatrice IS born from a young rooster.
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by SunsetVWF026 »

For the cockatrice descriptions...Waay too much mentioning of things turning to stone. You might want to make it a bit longer, maybe have some more interaction between magi and cockatrice...?
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by kevin19980609 »

How about now?
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by Gooey Kablooie »

I'd say it looks better now.
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by kevin19980609 »

Thanks!
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Re: Cockatrice+Hikari/Yami Dragons *Please Comment*

Post by kevin19980609 »

I will be gone most of the week. I will be back on Friday evening.

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